So Long 2018, Hello Freedom…and 2019
2018 may have been MY most challenging year yet, at least mentally. Losing a job, especially for someone like me, is like losing yourself. I felt like a hiker on Mt Everest in the middle of a white out. I was paralyzed. And even once the white out passed, I still had a long way up or down. It was all so overwhelming, and definitely fight or flight.
My big lessons for 2018: 1, when in a fight or flight situation, fighting just means not leaving. It doesn’t have to be valiant or heroic. Just a conscious choice to not give up. 2, I have ridiculous expectations of myself. No one else can beat me up quite like I do myself. I need to forgive myself and cut myself a little slack. 3, John loves me unconditionally. I don’t want to transverse this life without him. He grounds me. There’s a reason we’ve made it 25 years.
What were your lessons from 2018?
My word for 2019: freedom.
In 2018, I had to cast away all of my former labels.
In 2019, I am FREE to be ME.
I will be FREE of limitations.
I will be FREE of excuses.
I will be FREE from expectations.
What will your word be?
Stay tuned in 2019! More tarot card readings for sure. You’ll see some poetry, more art, and definitely more random acts of kindness. My goal in 2019 is to help my husband grow #daily180, so expect to see lots of acts of kindness.
Order a Painting for Christmas
Hey y’all, last year I sold a few paintings before Christmas thanks to my oldest challenging me, and some gracious family members.
This year, I thought I’d be a little more intentional.
Here’s how it will work, ordering details are below. We are going to keep it simple. You can purchase one I’ve already painted by shopping here. Or you can send me a private Facebook message by going here. For a new painting, we will use the following specifications:
Small $10 Up to 5×7 or 5×5
Medium $20 Up to 11×14 or 10×10
Large $40 Up to 16×20 or 12×12
XLarge $60 Anything larger
Paintings can be acrylic on wrapped canvas or canvas panel, or watercolor on paper (or dictionary page). Please note the “up to.” That means there are multiple sizes in each range to choose from, or leave it to the artist’s discretion.
Watercolor paintings can be framed and/or matted for an additional fee.
Shipping will be case-by-case.
I’m best with scenery and animals, and prefer a reference photo. I am willing to attempt abstract/geometric, and enjoy collages.
Deadline to order is Monday November 26 at midnight. Order by messaging me here.
Consider a personal, heartfelt gift for a friend (or neighbor) or family member today !
If you don’t need a painting, that’s ok. Share this post. That supports me more than you know.
Air Supply or Starship
This morning I sat down to work on my contract gig and I had highlighted “air supply, start here.” We all know (by the title, duh) where my brain instantly went. So I pulled up Pandora and created an Air Supply station.
I am an 80’s girl, and back then I loved Chicago, Journey, and any other bands that discussed love. Let’s be honest though, those songs were for moonlight skates only. 
We were girls who just wanted to have fun, which meant dance music!
So I play Air Supply and no offense, had to forward. Lots of Lionel Richie on that station. Some Whitney Houston. Journey. A little Chicago.
As an over-thinker, I naturally asked myself why did I get so excited over Air Supply. The answer, simple, I was thinking about Jefferson Airplane. And OLD Jefferson Airplane. Not the Jefferson Starship or Starship stuff from the 80’s.
When I was younger, I had a little record player and my mom’s old records (albums and 45s). I used to listen to the Jefferson Airplane Greatest Hits album over and over again. It’s also where I learned to love the Beatles, but that’s another story.
What memories come to mind when you see a certain band name or part of a song title or lyric?
Take 2 – Oracle Cards
SQUEE!!! What do y’all think about this round? I went ahead and changed the font because it was a little different and I didn’t want to turn anyone off. This new font is probably much too safe. I just prefer tomato A’s to pear A’s (if that makes any sense to anyone).
I’ve only made these edits to this 10, so 78 to go. What do you think?
What will your DOVOLUTION be?
For the last couple of weeks, we have looked at the concept of DOVOLUTION.
- Self-care
- Selfless acts
- Work a personal goal
Daily, we tried to accomplish something for each category above. I am slightly embarrassed to say I couldn’t do all 3 every day, every week. It was tough.
While I still believe it is early and we should not give up. Achieving one of each category was a goal in itself. So I thought, what if we step back for a second and build our DOVOLUTION muscles and stamina.
Here’s how we are going to do it. Keeping the idea of DOVOLUTION in mind (above) write down the following:
- What is it that you would like to accomplish?
- What daily act(s) will get you there? Remember to Keep It Simple.
- Hold yourself accountable
- Document daily
- Accountability buddy
I am hoping something like this will help. I know I need a contract to put on the fridge or something. I also I need someone to occasionally nag me if it’s really important. It’s only 21 days, what can it hurt?!
My suggestion is to pick a date and go with it. There is never really a perfect time. We just say that to ourselves to procrastinate. I do recognize that some of you may really need to wait until the beginning of September to start. Maybe right after Labor Day. Seriously, pick a start time that you know you will have more opportunity for success. In case you haven’t figured it out, I’m not running a challenge. This is just something I am doing for myself. I am happy to be someone’s accountability buddy if you don’t have one. I will even help more than one someones. And if there are enough, we can start a group or something. I just don’t want to worry about $ or anything like that.
So, what are some potential DOVOLUTIONS? Well, I could see things like:
- Lose weight: eat healthier by cutting carbs and adding fruits/vegs
- Lose weight: do cardio for at least 30 minutes per day
- Decrease mile time: run daily
- Volunteer: umm….I am not saying it twice.
- Learn more about ______: read 2 chapters a night
- Increase spirituality: meditate daily for 20 minutes
- Learn to crochet: watch a video and use that skill each day to produce that product
Other folks may want to learn how to use a new art medium, all the key phrases in a new language, or even a new skill for work. The important thing is you have 21 DAYS to show success. That means you need to KEEP IT SIMPLE. You aren’t going to be an expert in something by the end of those 21 days. But you CAN set a goal and achieve it.
And together, we CAN start a DOVOLUTION!
Think about it. Checkout the contract (which by the way is just for you). If you would like to chat about the 21 days, hit me up on Facebook.
Stay tuned for more on Accountability Buddies and things you can do to help someone else achieve their goals.
Dovolution – Make a Plan
Doing can be easy, once you have momentum. Does anyone have momentum after just one week? I certainly do not. It’s still so early. Our motors are just getting primed. It is more important than ever for us to plan right now. It is the best way to guarantee we have the right tools and resources at our fingertips when we need them. When we don’t feel supported, we give up. Sometimes, that’s due to our own lack of planning. Reflect briefly on last week, how successful were you? I was NOT as successful as I wanted. I tried something different each day, and that meant sometimes I didn’t do anything because I either couldn’t think of something, lost motivation, or became overwhelmed. It didn’t work like I wanted. Rub dirt on it. Apply some logic. Regroup. This week, I’m going to try something else. I’d like to see if I can build to a goal for each part of dovolution. Here’s what I’m thinking:
- Self – find a course to work on each day for an hour or so. If I can’t find a course, reading a book will work too. I’d like to look into art therapy, so maybe I’ll find something to research in that area. I’m still in exploration mode as I dream. Eventually I’ll find something practical to commit to.
- Someone else – this is the one I’m not sure about. I need to think about this one more – we’ll stay connected each day (check Instagram). I’m thinking something to do with painting.
- Goal – my goal for this week is to start working on the painting project for my niece’s baby. I need to get a specific thing for it still, paint the pictures, and assemble. I’ve been procrastinating for too long.
What approach are you going to take to this week’s dovolution? Are you going to set daily tasks/goals or progress towards a larger weekly goal? Keep us posted and let us know what works for you.
Find Your Road Home Fridays
Finding Your Road Home centers on the idea that home begins by determining where you want to be. It doesn’t have to be your actual home. It doesn’t have to make you happy (although why would you choose somewhere that makes you unhappy). Once you have determined your goal, you have to begin the journey.
This is where DOVOLUTION comes in. (I really love this concept.)
DOVOLUTION is about IMPROVING YOU, HELPING OTHERS WITHOUT EXPECTATION, and WORKING A GOAL. First, I don’t care what you do or what your goal is, as long as you have one. I encourage you to do something NEW, or something you have only been half-way doing. Commit to it. Do not cheat by picking something you have already been doing fairly regularly. Challenge yourself.
Keep it simple. Consider a small, daily goal to start. We are creating new habits here. Actively working to improve yourself isn’t easy in the beginning. This is because you aren’t only creating new habits, but you have to break old habits and moving out of your comfort zone. That’s why smaller is better. You want to build that feeling of success. Then work your way up to something bigger.
I recommend tieing your self-improvement/self-care plans to your goal when you can. When you can’t, follow the same keep it simple rule. Walk around the neighborhood, cut soda out of your diet, or even chair dance.
The final piece of the puzzle for DOVOLUTION is to help others without expectation. It doesn’t have to be anonymous (although that is fun), but doing it without the expectation of anything in return from the recipient of the good deed. The objective here is to just do what you can to help others.
I have been trying to keep track of my activities daily, not to brag or anything, just to make sure I do something. Basically, I am trying to hold myself accountable. In fact, you will notice, I slacked two days. My new goal is to not miss a day…
| Sunday | Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday | Friday | Saturday | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Something to Improve You | Walk with Dylan Go to Gym |
Nothing intentional | Visit rock store Long talk with old friend |
Nothing intentional | Research html | ||
| Something to Help Someone Else | Convince Dylan to Walk Relaunch blog |
Nothing intentional | Long talk with old friend | Nothing intentional | Flowers to stranger | ||
| Work a Personal Goal | Documented new goal | Researched new goal | Testing on technology Interview Entered paintings into Creative competition at TX State Fair |
Case study | Case study |
Walkabout Wednesdays
What better to go with DOVOLUTION than Walkabout Wednesday. I think of a walkabout as Self-care. It’s almost a form of meditation, at least for me. That makes it an important part of my dovolution.
The number of songs you choose is up to you. Use Spotify or Pandora (or a similar service). Choose to shuffle all your playlists. I even recommend forwarding through the first couple as like a cleanse.
Next, listen to your songs carefully. Document somehow. Pandora allows you to go backwards and see what songs you just listened to. I would assume the other services do something similar. Remember, you are walking, so you won’t be able to write right away.
Begin by thinking about your question. Do not make it a yes or no question. Don’t act like you are making a wish with a genie. Just ask a basic question like: How can I help my family while I am unemployed? I like to use HOW questions personally.
Here are some options:
3 songs – 9 – 15 minutes
- Your power
- Other’s influence
- Above all else, remember
6 songs – 18 – 30 minutes
- The reality of the situation
- The reality of the situation
- Your power
- Other’s influence
- Above all else, remember
- outcome
9 songs – 27 – 45 minutes
- The reality of the situation
- The reality of the situation
- Your power
- Your power
- Your power
- Other’s influence
- Above all else, remember
- Hopes/fears
- Outcome
The great part about walkabouts, you can use them whenever you feel that urge to run away. It is a great way to clear your mind and focus on something else for just a little bit of time.
If you do a walkabout, share your resulting playlist in the comments below.
DOVOLUTION – Goal Setting
I like to think of goal setting and achievement as the culminating steps in DOVOLUTION.
- What do I want to achieve?
- When do I want to achieve it by?
- How will I know when I am successful?
- Why do I want to do this?
- Who can help/support me during this?
Your goal may be related to self-care or even helping others. Or maybe you choose to follow a dream. No matter what, every successful goal addresses the questions above.
Have you heard of SMART goals? The definition of each letter varies from use to use. I have always know SMART as:
- Specific
- Measurable
- Achievable
- Relevant
- Time-bound
SMART goals have always been a part of K-12 education, and more than likely part of the HR experience. But for personal use, I want to do something a little different. Let’s line up SMART with our questions up top.
- Specific – What do I want to achieve?
- Measurable – How will I know when I am successful?
- Achievable – Who can help/support me during this?
- Relevant – Why do I want to do this?
- Time-bound – When do I want to achieve it by?
I get stuck when I try too hard to make my goal a single sentence. For example,
By Jan 2019, I will host 3 events per week working with kids at a park/trail, helping them to love nature and making obbservations.
I kept it to a single sentence. You know what I want to do and when I want to accomplish it by. But that doesn’t answer all of the questions. So we have to go back to the drawing board.
We have gone from a goal statement to a GOAL TABLE. Not sure about you, but my mind is slightly blown. This is just the start. This goal is by no means finished.
Before we move on to future steps, let’s set a goal. Let’s gently move through the process each Tuesday. What do you think?
So next Tuesday, we will look at just SPECIFIC – what do you want to achieve. We will even tear apart my suggestion above (it totally needs more details).
Go start a DOVOLUTION today! One for you, one for them, and work your goal ❤
